The message of family-centered traditions is paramount during the holiday season. You see, “There’s no place like home for the holidays,” from songs to movies to greeting cards.” As your children grow and technology becomes more omnipresent in their lives, that attitude may be harder to sustain. Filling a connection can be challenging when your kids seem glued to screens over break.
How do you leave room for your increasingly independent children to do their own thing while still staying connected? It can be challenging to strike that balance, but combining activities, friends, and family can keep everyone fulfilled. Keep reading to learn five ways to foster family connection during the holidays.
1. Embrace Technology — to a Point
Do your kids seem permanently affixed to their devices? Rather than outlaw tech, embrace it — after setting some boundaries. Use their love of screens to teach them ways to connect. Often, families live spread out across the country and even the globe. Teach them the importance of communication and staying in touch with loved ones by calling family far away.
If Grandma cannot travel for the holidays from across the country, have your kids call her. They could even do a video chat and bake holiday cookies together. Have the family ship each other gifts and do a family Zoom call when opening them. You could even get a safe phone for kids and program in family members’ numbers. It gives your kids a way to connect on their own.
2. Have Dedicated Family Time
It’s easy to idealize the holidays and what the school break will look like. Realistically, two weeks of fully immersed family time like a Hallmark movie isn’t going to happen. Plus, turning into Santa or Mrs. Claus is a lot of pressure. Instead of expecting to spend every minute together, set dedicated holiday family time. Allow family members time to themselves so they can fully be present during important times together.
As the holidays get closer, discuss the important things, everyone wants to do as a family. Maybe your daughter wants to ice skate, and your son wants to go sledding. You know when your family is getting together and when your partner’s family is. Outside of that, pick times for baking and movies, and decorating. Have a “no phone and fully present” policy during those times.
3. Share What You’re Grateful For
With the seasonal emphasis on gift shopping, the holidays are more about what you don’t have than what you do. Flip the script by sharing what you’re grateful for with your family and encouraging them to do the same. Let them know you’re thankful to have extra time together. When you create an environment of gratitude, you can take some of the pressure of the holidays off.
During the fall, you could start a family gratitude pumpkin. Every family member can write what they are grateful for on the pumpkin daily. It keeps growing all season until the pumpkin is complete. It adds connection because it’s a group activity, allowing you to see what’s in each other’s hearts.
4. Spread Cheer Together
As you share what you’re thankful for, think about what you have and can give versus what you want. It’s easy for kids to over-focus on things they want to get over the holidays. That tendency is exacerbated by extended family members continually asking what’s on their wish lists. During this season, show your children the value of helping others.
The holidays are known as the season of giving, so include them in giving back to the community. You can sing carols at a nursing home or adopt a family on a giving tree. You could take them shopping for family meals and buy extra items to donate to a food bank. Ask them what projects might be near to their heart. For example, a sick classmate might inspire them to make fleece blankets for kids in the hospital.
5. Don’t Ignore the Small Stuff
It’s tempting to want to plan one big elaborate holiday extravaganza. Social media tells the tale that everyone is doing tremendous things, so don’t miss out. But the small things done consistently add to connections and memories over the holiday. That sense of ritual creates an overall feeling of joy and comfort — better yet, the little things are easier to achieve.
So ditch the idea that your house needs to look like the cover of Better Homes & Gardens and elevate the small stuff. Make hot chocolate in the evening and share a mug with your kids. Challenge the family to play cards while listening to holiday classics and munching home-baked cookies. These moments can pull your big kids out of their rooms just like they did when they were little.
The holidays are about togetherness. It can make a lonely time for those who don’t have loved ones in their lives or are far away from them. Work to foster family connections during the holidays and share the importance of people with your kids. Embracing the above ideas can foster relationships over the holidays and help you build lasting memories.
